Hello dear readers,
My amazingly talented friend Zoe, who posts about things on the internet that I dare to dream of posting, but never would, as my internet presence is already sullied by my refusal to give up Facebook and a horrible memory for the passwords of at least 3 social networking tools, is on the road to fame and glory as a bad-ass, funny woman. One of the first steps has been getting her own domain name, where she writes lists and parodies and parody lists and demonstrates a finesse with Photoshop that is the envy of all our friends (or at least me). You can check out her stuff at http://www.madamezooble.com.
But I will admit that the point of this post was no solely to get more traffic for my friend's website, but to mention a piece of writing that is my favorite thing I've written in a long time. It's on another one of Zoe's blogs, Nurse Jackie Chan, which was started as a collaborative humor blog that has sort of not been updated in a while because its moderator is busy kissing pigs or something (follow Zoe on her award-winning Twitter for more on that).
So without further ado, here is a link to this post: Fantasies I Have While At My Day Job:
http://nursejackiechan.wordpress.com/2012/07/15/fantasies-i-have-while-at-my-day-job-episode-1/
Sorry for the repost, friends who have already read it, and you're welcome those who haven't (and Zoe!).
-ejl
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
What I Learned from Reading Fifty Shades of Gray
1. If you are annoyingly innocent, rich, powerful, attractive men will fall in love with you.
Alternately: If you are annoyingly innocent, creepy, controlling, moody, men with lots of baggage will want you to become their submissive, so it's probably better just to slut it up.
2. It is easier for women to orgasm from penetrative sex than it is for men.
3. If you in your annoying innocence attract a rich man, you will receive awesome gifts like computers, Blackberries, sports cars, and first editions of Thomas Hardy books. It's probably best to just accept them without question or he will spank you.
4. BDSM is a whole bunch of work.
5. If you refrain from getting drunk until you graduate from college, then start dating a rich man, you will instantly love and appreciate the expensive wine he buys for you instead of drinking Andre and Franzia like your more experienced college roommate.
6. If your 27 year old boyfriend has slept with other women, you should probably be really jealous. If your 27 year old boyfriend hasn't slept with other women and isn't super religious or super gay, he probably has absolutely no baggage and you should totally go on a camping trip with him in a strange state because it's not like he's going to break your heart in a tent or lead you on or anything because he is probably the perfect mate (okay this is no longer about 50 Shades of Gray).
7. It's pretty normal for people to be business tycoons by the age of 27.
8. If you're not orgasming when someone touches your nipples, there's probably something wrong with you.
9. There is a 3 hour time difference between Seattle and Georgia.
10. You don't have to be a good writer to get a book published.
Alternately: If you are annoyingly innocent, creepy, controlling, moody, men with lots of baggage will want you to become their submissive, so it's probably better just to slut it up.
2. It is easier for women to orgasm from penetrative sex than it is for men.
3. If you in your annoying innocence attract a rich man, you will receive awesome gifts like computers, Blackberries, sports cars, and first editions of Thomas Hardy books. It's probably best to just accept them without question or he will spank you.
4. BDSM is a whole bunch of work.
5. If you refrain from getting drunk until you graduate from college, then start dating a rich man, you will instantly love and appreciate the expensive wine he buys for you instead of drinking Andre and Franzia like your more experienced college roommate.
6. If your 27 year old boyfriend has slept with other women, you should probably be really jealous. If your 27 year old boyfriend hasn't slept with other women and isn't super religious or super gay, he probably has absolutely no baggage and you should totally go on a camping trip with him in a strange state because it's not like he's going to break your heart in a tent or lead you on or anything because he is probably the perfect mate (okay this is no longer about 50 Shades of Gray).
7. It's pretty normal for people to be business tycoons by the age of 27.
8. If you're not orgasming when someone touches your nipples, there's probably something wrong with you.
9. There is a 3 hour time difference between Seattle and Georgia.
10. You don't have to be a good writer to get a book published.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Things I Found While Cleaning Out My Car
1. Fossilized Cheez-Its
2. French language learning CDs
3. Evidence of a McDonald's coffee habit
4. Unused (and probably unusable) safer sex supplies
5. Directions to the Great Northern Mall
6. CDs I was "reviewing" for WMMT
7. CDs we crapped from WOBC
8. Taylor Swift memorabilia
9. ~1 pound of chicken feed
10. "Hanging name badges"
11. Evidence that I once took piano lessons
12. A tape measure
13. Old gum
14. 3 Bobby pins
15. $1.68 in change
16. 1 fingerless glove
17. Fake flowers
18. Real flowers
19. LaCroix Coconut cans
20. Directions from Berea, Kentucky to Oberlin
Things I Didn't Find:
1. Waldo
2. True love
3. A dead animal
2. French language learning CDs
3. Evidence of a McDonald's coffee habit
4. Unused (and probably unusable) safer sex supplies
5. Directions to the Great Northern Mall
6. CDs I was "reviewing" for WMMT
7. CDs we crapped from WOBC
8. Taylor Swift memorabilia
9. ~1 pound of chicken feed
10. "Hanging name badges"
11. Evidence that I once took piano lessons
12. A tape measure
13. Old gum
14. 3 Bobby pins
15. $1.68 in change
16. 1 fingerless glove
17. Fake flowers
18. Real flowers
19. LaCroix Coconut cans
20. Directions from Berea, Kentucky to Oberlin
Things I Didn't Find:
1. Waldo
2. True love
3. A dead animal
How to Have An Awesome Wedding
Since graduating from high school, I have been a guest at 5 weddings, been a bridesmaid in one, played music for one, and worked catering for one wedding. These have all been beautiful, enjoyable, moving events. Two of the weddings were the weddings of complete strangers, and at both of those I got a little dust in my eyes. I used to date someone with an ex-wife. My brother thinks I'll get married young and divorced soon after. I pride myself on knowing a good time when I see one. Plus, I just watched like 5 episodes of Say Yes to the Dress. I'm pretty sure that these experiences makes me an expert on the subject of weddings. So here are the wedding tips I have gathered over the years and feel the need to share with the world.
According to my mother and various other sources, you don't really remember too many details of your own wedding. So in my eyes, the wedding is less about the party that is being thrown for you, and more about providing a way for your guests to have fun while being incredibly happy for you as you get this piece of paper that legitimizes in the eyes of the state something that shouldn't need to be made legitimate in the eyes of the law (so this is a little convoluted, but it's pretty messed up that I'll be able to marry whatever schmuck I want while my roommate who is gay won't be able to marry the love of his life. Guys, love shouldn't need a piece of paper to make it real. Moving on.). Basically, your wedding should be the best party you will ever throw. The best parties ever aren't perfect, but they are fun.
1. On the subject of alcohol at weddings:
Unless the bride or groom are recovering alcoholics or 16, you should serve alcohol at your wedding. You don't need an open bar because those are expensive, but at the very least, tap a keg or something. Here's why:
- Most of the guests at the wedding will know very few people besides you. I've been to weddings of close friends, relatives, co-workers, and complete strangers, and at every single one, I have known less than 1/5 of the guests. And guess what? Unless you're the ones getting married, or you're marrying your cousin or you're only inviting like 20 people, the vast majority of people at your wedding won't know very many of the guests. Plus there's always so much pressure from DJs to dance to stupid songs at the reception (more on this in Point 3). This is where the socially lubricating powers of alcohol can come in handy. Even if you don't know very many people, you can still get drunk for free with the people you don't know as you celebrate the union of your friends. Okay, this is kind of sad and is perhaps the kind of thing that will jeopardize my ability to get a job, so I'm just gonna quit while I'm ahead. But have booze.
2. The service itself/the sermon:
Look, religion is very personal and very important to a lot of people. Even if I don't share your religious beliefs, I respect them. I also respect the person who is officiating the ceremony, and their choice of words for the service.
However, I cannot respect them if they make that "Woah-man" joke. If you're not familiar, let me fill you in.
Preacher: So God made Adam. But Adam was lonely. So God did some stuff to Adam's rib and made Eve. When Adam saw Eve, he was like "Woah-man!" And that's why we called Eve Woman.
Audience: *Polite laughter*
Me: *Eyes roll out of head, subtly vomits into handbag*
This joke has been made at 1/4 of the weddings I have attended. Don't get me wrong, I love bad jokes. But this one is just too much, especially when it is followed by a lecture from the preacher about how the wife is supposed to submit to the husband.
3. Music at weddings:
As a musician, radio nerd, and aspiring Radio Personality, music at the wedding reception is one of the things that can really determine the tone of the party.
Many wedding DJs seem to think that it is their responsibility to get as many people on to the dance floor as possible. While in theory, I agree, in practice, most DJs sink to really low levels to get there, by playing intergenerational crowd-pleasers, and what I call the Trifecta of Bad Wedding Songs: YMCA, You Make Me Wanna Shout, and the Cha Cha Slide (sometimes these can be replaced by The Twist, The Electric Slide, or Cotton Eyed Joe. But for our purposes, they're the same). Again, I appreciate all of these songs in isolation. I also like it when a lot of other people dance. But these songs are often accompanied by pressure on the entire crowd to get up and dance.
Let's be honest:
a). Some people would rather sit and talk to people
b). Some people are bad dancers and don't like to dance. Let's just keep those folks off the dance floor.
c). Some people can't physically dance. DJs don't need to make them feel like they're not contributing to the fun for not getting out on the floor if they can't walk much less do that ridiculous thing where everyone squats on the ground during You Make Me Wanna Shout.
d). Sometimes people have dry weddings. See Point 1.
My advice to those who are getting married? Play the music that you want to have played. At the wedding I recently helped cater, the bride and groom did exactly this. They played classic rock, new pop, and some really great old songs. They also played You Make Me Wanna Shout, followed by the Cha Cha Slide, almost followed by the YMCA, but then the MC was all "JK, we won't do that to you." Because intergenerational crowd pleasers are fine as long as most of the other songs are better.
4. Bathrooms at weddings:
Have lots and lots of them. If it's outside, rent Porta-Potties. Because you can't enjoy the party for your friends if you're waiting in line to pee.
5. Outdoor weddings:
If they happen in the summer in the South, make sure there is a place nearby where your Grandma can escape to the AC. Because heat stroke/people leaving early because they're too hot is a bummer. Also make sure there is plenty of water.
6. Dust:
I don't know if it's because wedding venues are used frequently by lots of different people and are difficult to clean, or if there's some kind of crazy pollen during outdoor wedding season, or if I'm just a sentimental fool, but my eyes water a lot at weddings. It's almost a given that someone (me) will be bawling like a little baby during the ceremony, while reading the program, watching the Father-Daughter dance, hearing the speeches, singing the hymns, or just watching the reactions of the other guests (cause love is beautiful, m'kay?). So I guess what I'm saying is, make sure there are tissues or give out handkerchiefs or waterproof mascara with your names on it as favors, perhaps.
Conclusion:
Ultimately, you will plan the wedding you will plan. Perhaps by the time I get married, I will care less about the music (or will have had a head injury that makes me absolutely love the Trifecta of Bad Wedding Songs), or won't be so hung up on making sure everyone has a great time as I am getting wedding planning over with so I can just enjoy tax benefits. But I sure hope not. In about 10 years, I'm hoping to have a hell of a party. And maybe if you're lucky, you'll be invited.
According to my mother and various other sources, you don't really remember too many details of your own wedding. So in my eyes, the wedding is less about the party that is being thrown for you, and more about providing a way for your guests to have fun while being incredibly happy for you as you get this piece of paper that legitimizes in the eyes of the state something that shouldn't need to be made legitimate in the eyes of the law (so this is a little convoluted, but it's pretty messed up that I'll be able to marry whatever schmuck I want while my roommate who is gay won't be able to marry the love of his life. Guys, love shouldn't need a piece of paper to make it real. Moving on.). Basically, your wedding should be the best party you will ever throw. The best parties ever aren't perfect, but they are fun.
1. On the subject of alcohol at weddings:
Unless the bride or groom are recovering alcoholics or 16, you should serve alcohol at your wedding. You don't need an open bar because those are expensive, but at the very least, tap a keg or something. Here's why:
- Most of the guests at the wedding will know very few people besides you. I've been to weddings of close friends, relatives, co-workers, and complete strangers, and at every single one, I have known less than 1/5 of the guests. And guess what? Unless you're the ones getting married, or you're marrying your cousin or you're only inviting like 20 people, the vast majority of people at your wedding won't know very many of the guests. Plus there's always so much pressure from DJs to dance to stupid songs at the reception (more on this in Point 3). This is where the socially lubricating powers of alcohol can come in handy. Even if you don't know very many people, you can still get drunk for free with the people you don't know as you celebrate the union of your friends. Okay, this is kind of sad and is perhaps the kind of thing that will jeopardize my ability to get a job, so I'm just gonna quit while I'm ahead. But have booze.
2. The service itself/the sermon:
Look, religion is very personal and very important to a lot of people. Even if I don't share your religious beliefs, I respect them. I also respect the person who is officiating the ceremony, and their choice of words for the service.
However, I cannot respect them if they make that "Woah-man" joke. If you're not familiar, let me fill you in.
Preacher: So God made Adam. But Adam was lonely. So God did some stuff to Adam's rib and made Eve. When Adam saw Eve, he was like "Woah-man!" And that's why we called Eve Woman.
Audience: *Polite laughter*
Me: *Eyes roll out of head, subtly vomits into handbag*
This joke has been made at 1/4 of the weddings I have attended. Don't get me wrong, I love bad jokes. But this one is just too much, especially when it is followed by a lecture from the preacher about how the wife is supposed to submit to the husband.
3. Music at weddings:
As a musician, radio nerd, and aspiring Radio Personality, music at the wedding reception is one of the things that can really determine the tone of the party.
Many wedding DJs seem to think that it is their responsibility to get as many people on to the dance floor as possible. While in theory, I agree, in practice, most DJs sink to really low levels to get there, by playing intergenerational crowd-pleasers, and what I call the Trifecta of Bad Wedding Songs: YMCA, You Make Me Wanna Shout, and the Cha Cha Slide (sometimes these can be replaced by The Twist, The Electric Slide, or Cotton Eyed Joe. But for our purposes, they're the same). Again, I appreciate all of these songs in isolation. I also like it when a lot of other people dance. But these songs are often accompanied by pressure on the entire crowd to get up and dance.
Let's be honest:
a). Some people would rather sit and talk to people
b). Some people are bad dancers and don't like to dance. Let's just keep those folks off the dance floor.
c). Some people can't physically dance. DJs don't need to make them feel like they're not contributing to the fun for not getting out on the floor if they can't walk much less do that ridiculous thing where everyone squats on the ground during You Make Me Wanna Shout.
d). Sometimes people have dry weddings. See Point 1.
My advice to those who are getting married? Play the music that you want to have played. At the wedding I recently helped cater, the bride and groom did exactly this. They played classic rock, new pop, and some really great old songs. They also played You Make Me Wanna Shout, followed by the Cha Cha Slide, almost followed by the YMCA, but then the MC was all "JK, we won't do that to you." Because intergenerational crowd pleasers are fine as long as most of the other songs are better.
4. Bathrooms at weddings:
Have lots and lots of them. If it's outside, rent Porta-Potties. Because you can't enjoy the party for your friends if you're waiting in line to pee.
5. Outdoor weddings:
If they happen in the summer in the South, make sure there is a place nearby where your Grandma can escape to the AC. Because heat stroke/people leaving early because they're too hot is a bummer. Also make sure there is plenty of water.
6. Dust:
I don't know if it's because wedding venues are used frequently by lots of different people and are difficult to clean, or if there's some kind of crazy pollen during outdoor wedding season, or if I'm just a sentimental fool, but my eyes water a lot at weddings. It's almost a given that someone (me) will be bawling like a little baby during the ceremony, while reading the program, watching the Father-Daughter dance, hearing the speeches, singing the hymns, or just watching the reactions of the other guests (cause love is beautiful, m'kay?). So I guess what I'm saying is, make sure there are tissues or give out handkerchiefs or waterproof mascara with your names on it as favors, perhaps.
Conclusion:
Ultimately, you will plan the wedding you will plan. Perhaps by the time I get married, I will care less about the music (or will have had a head injury that makes me absolutely love the Trifecta of Bad Wedding Songs), or won't be so hung up on making sure everyone has a great time as I am getting wedding planning over with so I can just enjoy tax benefits. But I sure hope not. In about 10 years, I'm hoping to have a hell of a party. And maybe if you're lucky, you'll be invited.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Sarah Palin is My Feminist Hero and Other Half Truths
Note: This post is long, potentially boring, and an example of how easily I am swayed by autobiographies. Maybe I'm a sucker, but I respect Sarah Palin a little more than I used to, and I'm gonna tell you why.
My reading list this summer has been incredibly fluffy. I must confess that one of the more substantial books I read this summer has been Sarah Palin's autobiography: Going Rogue (this tells you what kind of summer I've been having). Now as you may or may not have deduced from my blog/knowing me/knowing my parents, I am a pretty liberal lady. But I also love playing Devil's Advocate, and quite frankly, pissing off other liberals on occasion. Maybe this makes me annoying, but I prefer to think of it as keeping others from becoming complacent. It took me about 5 months to figure out how I felt about mountain top removal, and I get frustrated when others, liberal and conservative, seem to stumble into their beliefs without questioning anything.
So maybe it was my desire to challenge myself (obviously not reading-wise), or a response to my recent trip to Alaska that inspired me to check Going Rogue out of the library.
I'll confess, I read the entire book, but read the parts when Palin talks about abortion, God, and big government much much faster (aka skimmed them) than I read the parts about her family, her role in Alaska state politics, and her childhood.
Here is a quick summary of my conclusions:
Conclusion Number 1: Sarah Palin is, indeed a feminist, and not a ploy by the patriarchy to set the women's rights movement back by making female politicians look stupid, as I had once expected.
Explanation: Sarah may not be pro-life, but she hasn't let traditional gender roles keep her out of politics. She managed to be an attentive mother (although I think she neglected Bristol a little in my humble, what-do-I-know-I've-never-raised-kids opinion) at the same time that she was kicking the Old Boys' Club out of Alaskan politics, and on the campaign trail.
Which leads me to...
Conclusion Number 2: Sarah Palin was a much better politician in Alaska than she was in national politics.
Explanation: (Also further explanation of Conclusion Number 1): She didn't let rich, powerful men push her around. Her administration managed to get rid of a lot of corrupt folks in the Alaskan legislature. Not to mention that even though I don't really agree with her "Drill baby, drill" attitude, she didn't take any bull crap from Big Oil when it came to drilling contracts, and tried to prioritize Alaskan or Canadian companies who were employing Alaskans to work at oil sites.
Conclusion Number 3: Sarah Palin was royally screwed by the media. Because she was a woman.
Explanation: So Sarah Palin may not be the brightest crayon in the box, but she isn't as stupid as the media portrayed her. Also, according to her, the quote wasn't "You can see Russia from my house," it was something more like "In parts of Alaska (the Aleutians) you can see Russia." This was in response to an interview about the role Alaska played globally. Okay, so that might have not been the most relevant response to the question (I would have mentioned oil and fish first, but I don't think I'll ever be in that position), but whatever.
A better example of this would be the flack that she took for being a mother on the presidential campaign trail. The media probably wouldn't have criticized a father for trying to further his career. Especially since Sarah's children came with her. Again, I don't have kids, but I still see a double standard.
My favorite example (and one that Palin regretfully forgot to mention in her book) is Who's Nailin' Palin, which is in case you are unfamiliar (don't even ask how I am familiar, it's not a very good story), is the only example of pornography (according to a friend) where you fast forward through the sex scenes to hear the dialogue. Would the porn industry make a film called "Who's Layin' McCain" or one about Obama (sorry I can't come up with a clever name)? Okay, maybe they would, because if you can imagine it, there's probably porn about it. But it's much less likely, and much less likely that it would end up in the hands of college freshmen all over America, because Obama and McCain are men. People can look at men in positions of power, and ignore the fact that they are sexual beings. Women in positions of power however, are sexualized or mocked for not being sexy enough, or for being tough, or seeming cold. It just ain't fair folks.
So if you made it through this post, congratulations. I wouldn't recommend Going Rogue for the writing, or for the political opinions, but it does shed some insights onto Alaska, what it's like being a vice presidential candidate for the Republican party, and the enigma (jk, she's not really an enigma) that is Sarah Palin.
My reading list this summer has been incredibly fluffy. I must confess that one of the more substantial books I read this summer has been Sarah Palin's autobiography: Going Rogue (this tells you what kind of summer I've been having). Now as you may or may not have deduced from my blog/knowing me/knowing my parents, I am a pretty liberal lady. But I also love playing Devil's Advocate, and quite frankly, pissing off other liberals on occasion. Maybe this makes me annoying, but I prefer to think of it as keeping others from becoming complacent. It took me about 5 months to figure out how I felt about mountain top removal, and I get frustrated when others, liberal and conservative, seem to stumble into their beliefs without questioning anything.
So maybe it was my desire to challenge myself (obviously not reading-wise), or a response to my recent trip to Alaska that inspired me to check Going Rogue out of the library.
I'll confess, I read the entire book, but read the parts when Palin talks about abortion, God, and big government much much faster (aka skimmed them) than I read the parts about her family, her role in Alaska state politics, and her childhood.
Here is a quick summary of my conclusions:
Conclusion Number 1: Sarah Palin is, indeed a feminist, and not a ploy by the patriarchy to set the women's rights movement back by making female politicians look stupid, as I had once expected.
Explanation: Sarah may not be pro-life, but she hasn't let traditional gender roles keep her out of politics. She managed to be an attentive mother (although I think she neglected Bristol a little in my humble, what-do-I-know-I've-never-raised-kids opinion) at the same time that she was kicking the Old Boys' Club out of Alaskan politics, and on the campaign trail.
Which leads me to...
Conclusion Number 2: Sarah Palin was a much better politician in Alaska than she was in national politics.
Explanation: (Also further explanation of Conclusion Number 1): She didn't let rich, powerful men push her around. Her administration managed to get rid of a lot of corrupt folks in the Alaskan legislature. Not to mention that even though I don't really agree with her "Drill baby, drill" attitude, she didn't take any bull crap from Big Oil when it came to drilling contracts, and tried to prioritize Alaskan or Canadian companies who were employing Alaskans to work at oil sites.
Conclusion Number 3: Sarah Palin was royally screwed by the media. Because she was a woman.
Explanation: So Sarah Palin may not be the brightest crayon in the box, but she isn't as stupid as the media portrayed her. Also, according to her, the quote wasn't "You can see Russia from my house," it was something more like "In parts of Alaska (the Aleutians) you can see Russia." This was in response to an interview about the role Alaska played globally. Okay, so that might have not been the most relevant response to the question (I would have mentioned oil and fish first, but I don't think I'll ever be in that position), but whatever.
A better example of this would be the flack that she took for being a mother on the presidential campaign trail. The media probably wouldn't have criticized a father for trying to further his career. Especially since Sarah's children came with her. Again, I don't have kids, but I still see a double standard.
My favorite example (and one that Palin regretfully forgot to mention in her book) is Who's Nailin' Palin, which is in case you are unfamiliar (don't even ask how I am familiar, it's not a very good story), is the only example of pornography (according to a friend) where you fast forward through the sex scenes to hear the dialogue. Would the porn industry make a film called "Who's Layin' McCain" or one about Obama (sorry I can't come up with a clever name)? Okay, maybe they would, because if you can imagine it, there's probably porn about it. But it's much less likely, and much less likely that it would end up in the hands of college freshmen all over America, because Obama and McCain are men. People can look at men in positions of power, and ignore the fact that they are sexual beings. Women in positions of power however, are sexualized or mocked for not being sexy enough, or for being tough, or seeming cold. It just ain't fair folks.
So if you made it through this post, congratulations. I wouldn't recommend Going Rogue for the writing, or for the political opinions, but it does shed some insights onto Alaska, what it's like being a vice presidential candidate for the Republican party, and the enigma (jk, she's not really an enigma) that is Sarah Palin.
Monday, June 18, 2012
Work It
My attitude about work has been most influenced by the following 2 quotes (I might have paraphrased a little though). The first is from an ex-boyfriend, who would always say something along the lines of "Sometimes a job is just a job." He is one of the smartest, hardest working people I know. The 2nd comes from the father of a friend, who said something like the following, in regards to people who want "fun" jobs, "It's called work for a reason."
I am a hard worker. I don't know if it's because my parents instilled in me that it's important to finish tasks, or the fact that my dad was a first generation college student who worked construction and a whole bunch of other stuff to pay his way through school and get his Ph.D. so his kids wouldn't have to do the same thing. I'm not sure if it's because I'm compensating for the fact that 2 generations of women in my family don't know how to clean. I'm in an interesting position of privilege. After all, I do go to a private liberal arts school and I will graduate with no debt. But I am also in that position partially because my father, grandfather, and great grandmother worked really really really fucking hard to get me here (I mean it didn't hurt that they were all white, and 2 of them were male, but that's for another post).
Perhaps because I am a hard worker, I love working. I love the nervous feeling you get right before you start a new job. I love the honeymoon period that happens right after you start the job, coming home gushing about free coffee, free flowers, your cool co-workers, your helpful boss. I also appreciate that the honeymoon period ends, and you start to realize the problems with the place you are working, and begin to wish that you could just sleep in when your alarm goes off. But at this point, I tell myself that a job is just a job, it's something that you have to do so you can eat, have a warm house, and put gas in your car. Work is called work for a reason, if you didn't get wiped out from scrubbing pots, didn't get really tired of smiling at people and flirting with old men, didn't get frustrated when you couldn't save the world, you might as well be at home sitting on the couch picking lint out of your belly button.
This is not to say that work is always terrible and not something that one can enjoy. My father has worked for the same place since he was my age, and he loves it. But that's not to say that he loves every meeting, deadline, and bit of bureaucracy that he has to deal with.
At times, I've genuinely enjoyed every job that I've had. I liked the job at the non-profit better than food service, but that's to be expected. I rarely broke a sweat or got covered in spaghetti sauce at the non-profit. But I love smiling at people, talking to bunches of strangers, making peoples' days a little brighter, getting to know co-workers, and of course, getting paid. I'm lucky that I'm a good cafeteria lady, and I think I'm relatively good at working in the food service industry, because I genuinely love people, and am good at dealing with them. Even when my boss is driving me nuts, a customer is mean, and it takes me a longer time to do a task than I would have liked, I remind myself that a job is just a job, and I feel less frustrated, and more like one of billions of people who work jobs that are just jobs.
I'm hoping my job as a catering cafeteria lady isn't my permanent one. I don't think I could ever be as excited about it in the same way that my dad is about his job. Let's be honest, some jobs just invoke more excitement than others. I'm really lucky that working in the Oberlin College dining hall will not be the last stop in my career. And I'm lucky that I came from a situation that will make this possible. But you know what? Even if I do graduate and become a career cafeteria lady, I will work hard at it. Because that's just what you have to do.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Hey Man Look At Me Rocking Out (I'm On the Radio!)
Once upon a time in a crazy little town at a crazy little school, a crazy little girl from another crazy little town was trying to figure out how to survive among people from crazy big towns, in crazy classes, and crazy social situations. And then she found radio, in a slightly bigger, equally crazy town. She went back to her crazy school, and somehow got a show at the radio station. The rest is another story.
My experiences at WOBC have been like a wild and wacky roller coaster where sometimes the seat belts come off and you go upside-down and almost splat on the sidewalk below. If I had a quarter for every time I've said something disparaging about station politics, I would be able to do laundry. For the next 4 years.
But WOBC's been really good to me. Once a week, I get to ramble and play music on my show. I get access to so much music, and get to organize to my heart's content. I get to work the door and take money from cute boys at parties. I get to help lead a group of fellow folk music enthusiasts as we eat snacks, do crossword puzzles, and are incredibly critical of new music that enters the station.
More importantly, I feel more comfortable doing things in the station than I do anywhere else on campus. There's nothing quite as soothing as alphabetizing vinyl blues anthologies when you've just come from 99 cent Margarita night with your ex-boyfriend and are feeling really weird about relationships. There's nothing like making people who intimidate you laugh with your jokes about crapping cds. There's nothing like staying up late in the station finishing a paper listening to disco Christmas music and talking to all of the DJs who come in because you just can't work in the library any more. There's nothing like discovering acd that has some connection to a place you used to live, and feeling transported to a different life stage. Most of the time when I'm in the radio station, my stress and social anxiety temporarily melts away.
Anyway, I really love radio and I really love WOBC. And I think sometimes they both love me.
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